CHAPTER 5 - THE BEAUTY OF FAMILY IN THE SMALL CHURCH

The small church is like family. Everyone knows each other. They laugh together, study God's Word together, worship together, eat together. Each one encourages one another, counsels each other, keeps each other's children, weeps with them in their sorrow, and rejoices with them in their victories.

A member of a small church is not isolated and alone. The member is a vital part of the whole family that makes up the small church. When a member is absent from Sunday morning worship, they are missed. The church is not complete when its members are not there. A small church feels the absence and expresses its concern for the missing member.

The small church lives out the exhortation's of the apostle Paul to Timothy regarding how he was to treat members of the church. Paul wrote, in 1 Tim. 5:1-2, "Do not rebuke an older man, but exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, older women as sisters, younger women as sisters, with all purity."

In the small church, the older men are given the dignity and respect they deserve. These older saints have held almost every position in the church and have seen good times and bad. They have much wisdom to give and they should be allowed to have their say, because they have earned the right to speak with their faithfulness, their tithes, their work, and their love for the family of the church over many decades. They are to be honored as fathers in the faith and if their ideas seem a bit antiquated for these days, the principles behind the ideas which they present are important and should be heeded. God commanded that we are to "honor your father and your mother" (Ex. 20:12). With Paul's instruction to treat an older man as a father, this command also applies to how we treat older men in the church.

In the small church, older women are to be treated as mothers. Just as Ex. 20:12 applies to older men in the church, it also applies to older women in the church. The older women have raised most of the younger men and women as children in the faith. These older women have been their Sunday School teachers, their GA leaders, their Sunbeam leaders, and more. With Christ working through the older women, many of the young adults in the small church were led to faith in Christ by these stalwarts of the faith. In my church, I often say I have many mothers in the church, and I do. These dear older ladies treat me like their son and I respect them as I do my own mother. Like older men, they have much wisdom to give and they are a valuable resource for keeping harmony in the small church.

In the small church, younger men are to be treated as brothers. Some of our younger men are more interested in making a career than growing in Christ. We need to lovingly come along beside them and show them how to balance career, family, and following Christ. Our older men are fabulous resources for mentoring these younger men. The small church is a great environment for older men and younger men to socialize, work side by side, and care for each other.

In the small church, younger women are to be treated as sisters. It grieves my heart when I hear of pastors who take advantage of their position and influence for the purposes of having sexual relations with younger women in the church. Younger women are not be viewed as objects of sexual desire. They are sisters in the faith of Christ. When a pastor or anyone else in the church, seeks a sexual relationship with his spiritual sister, it is an evil and wicked display of spiritual incest. The small church bands together to protect the younger women as a brother would protect a sister from the enticements of strangers.

In the small church, all people of different ages commonly interact with one another and thus, the older men have occasions to mentor the younger men. In like manner, the older women have opportunities to guide the younger women in the faith. The small church provides an intimacy of relationship between generations that does not occur in any other venue. Thank God for the beauty of the family in the small church.