Not
too many years ago there was an extremely
limited selection of breakfast
cereals: corn flakes, oatmeal, cream of wheat, and maybe a couple of others.
Today in most grocery stores both sides
of a full aisle are devoted to cereal options.
We have become accustomed to having something for everyone.
This
"having something for everyone" creates
a dilemma for the church-especially the
smaller church. The first dilemma is theological:
The church is a family (1 Tim. 3: 15; 5: 1-2). Families are healthiest when they
inter-mix and inter-relate with each other, rather than each member living a separate
life that caters to his/her desires and interests.
The
second dilemma is practical: It is impossible
for the smaller church to have a specialized
ministry for everyone. How can it have
a youth "group" when there are only two
teens? Or a "singles ministry" when there
is only one single over age 25?Or a ministry for divorcees? Or alcoholics? Or offer
both a contemporary and traditional service (not to mention
a seeker service!) when
there aren't enough people for multiple
services? How, in the smaller church, are we to offer
"something for everyone"
to a world that has grown accustomed
to an aisle-full of cereals?
Perhaps
we should consider the advantages of churches that are too small for specialized
ministries.
Intergenerational
At
a recent funeral service for a senior saint who
had lived to be 88, I listened as RHMA's Harold Longenecker remarked about the wisdom the deceased had imparted to younger people during the latter years of his life. But in the same breath he lamented
the fact that church life today is so segmented
and compartmentalized that different
ages don't benefit from each other's stories and experiences nearly as much as they could.
Picture
the family arriving on Sunday morning
in the larger church. The kids run to different Sunday School classes. One goes
to
the nursery. After Sunday School one goes
to children's church, another to junior church,
the third remains in the nursery, and Dad
and Mom go to the adult worship service.
When the morning is over, they get back together in their van and head home.
With
everyone having their own "subchurch" one has to
wonder: When did anyone in this church
last have a small-town
cafe. "Do you get much rain out here?"
he asked. conversation with someone
20 years younger or older than he?
But
now picture Sunday morning in the The family goes their separate ways for
Sunday School but then, because
there is no children's or junior church,
they are together for the worship service.
Can
you see some advantage to the smaller church? True, there are also advantages
to the compartmentalizing that happens in larger
churches. (This article is not meant to be an argument for one
over the other. Both have
their advantages.) But because there are
also advantages to mixing ages, smaller churches
don't have to view their inter-generationalism as
being something for which they must apologize. Rather they should
accentuate the strengths of different ages mixing together.
Consider
Wednesday night. There is no kids'
program—a negative, right? In some ways
yes. But in others not. The kids and adults
interact with each other during Bible Study.
This isn't all bad! And what better way for kids to learn
to pray? And adults, who
sometimes strive to use lofty, "spiritual-sounding"
words in their praying, benefit from
listening to the simple, but beautiful, prayers of children.
There
is great advantage when people of all ages
mix together in church. And this doesn't
apply to just the formal services but to
times when the church plays volleyball together (the smaller church needs every age
person to make two teams!), goes caroling, or enjoys a time of fellowship in
someone's home.
One
youth pastor who has served in both smaller
and bigger churches noted, "Teenagers
who experience only the youth group
and never bond with others in the church
are almost guaranteed to drop out [of church] after high
school. If it's only the youth group that drew them, then only the youth
group can hold them. No more youth group,
no more kids. That's why I worked so hard to get our
mega-church kids interacting with
the rest of the church. But it was nigh unto
impossible. Large churches tend to have
an age-division paradigm that controls everything." 1
There
is great benefit when all ages mix together
in church. There is benefit to separating ages too, but if that is
not a possibility
in your church, don't look at it as all bad. The small-town
church is one of the few
places left in American society where inter-generational
relationships still exist. The
advantages to this are so great that the pastor
need not apologize when a visiting family asks whether the church has a teen ministry.
Instead he can share the advantages
of functioning like a family.
A
Place for Everyone
A
pastor was asked a number of questions by an out-of-towner who was curious
about
his
church:
"How
many ministries does your church have? Do you have a singles ministry?"
"Yes,
we do."
"How
about a ministry to the handicapped?"
"Yes."
"Single
parents?"
"Yes."
"College
age?"
"Yes."
"Widows?"
"Yes."
"Wow!
How big is your church?"
"Fifty-five."
In
most every smaller church you'll find couples and divorcees
and singles and handicapped
and alcoholics all inter-mixing with
each other, benefitting from each other's unique situations and experiences.
In
the smaller church everyone is ministered to by including them with everyone
else.
There
is no handicapped class, or singles' class,
or widows' class—they're all just part of the
fellowship, treated like everyone else.
When
you think about it, who do seniors need to be around to stay healthy? Just other
seniors? It is kids that put a spark in their eyes, not to
mention the fact that seniors
have a lot to offer kids!
Who
should singles be with? They are healthiest
and happiest when mixing with couples
and families. I recently visited a small-town
church which has a single lady in her
forties who is an integral part of every aspect
of church life. She is frequently invited
to church people's homes, and she invites
them to hers. No way does she consider her church inferior to a bigger church
with a singles ministry! There is a good
big-church option just down the road a few
miles in a neighboring city, but she is not even tempted.
How
about alcoholics? Some time ago I talked
with a young alcoholic who had made a
deliberate choice to attend a smaller church
where she wasn't expected to be a part of a class for
alcoholics. She believed that
the best way to overcome her addiction
was to interact with healthy non- alcoholics.
A
few months ago I visited a smaller church which had a handicapped girl in
attendance.
It
warmed my heart to see how she was treated as one of the bunch. Kids played with
her as if she was just like them. Adults interacted
with her. If she needed special help
navigating her wheelchair, there were plenty of hands anxious to offer
assistance. I couldn't help but wonder what advantage there
could be for this girl in a church with a
specialized ministry for handicapped children. I noted that these advantages extended
to the non-handicapped as well, who
had learned valuable lessons about people:
Everyone is accepted. Everyone is included. Everyone is treated like everyone else.
A
husband and wife with six children told a pastor-friend
of mine that they were thinking
of
moving out of their small town of 500 because they wondered if their children were
missing out on benefits that might be available
elsewhere. In reality, the most benefits
for their children might be had right where
they were! The next time someone asks
what programs your church has for teens, don't apologize.
Instead say, "We have
church!"
1
Dave McClellan, "The Small-Church
Advantage,"
Group (Jan-Feb 1999), p. 34.
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